Energy Management | The Big Picture
First Things First
Let’s take our eyes off our end-goals and shift our focus to managing our personal energy in such a way that we keep ourselves in our most productive state. Naturally.
If we want to rock the end result, we must first love and nurture the root of all issues, human nature. Only then will we be set free – authentically. Empowered naturally.
Behavior before strategy.
The root our problem as humans is that we have difficulty staying accountable to the present moment. We don’t move forward in life because we don’t understand our energy, not because we aren’t smart enough to accomplish the tasks at hand. – Coach B.
Be advised: this is powerful
One of our greatest flaws as humans is that we are inherently designed to trip ourselves up. While we possess unlimited potential, we are born with our worst enemy hardcoded into our DNA our ego. If not properly managed, the human ego is powerful enough to sabotage every goal and intention we have for ourselves. The ego has a way of infiltrating our thoughts and beliefs- it robs us of simple joys, fills our minds with chatter, and derails us from moving forward with an onslaught of self-imposed distractions. We have to be mindful. We are dealing with human nature here. This is serious business. You have to be present enough to recognize that your ego is inventing situations to upset you.
When the ego has you in its grip, you are not present. Your work is to work to free yourself from this false voice trying to dictate your reality. Let’s blow the lid off the ego, once and for all, and give you the tools to clear your mind and heart of negative chatter and small thinking.
First things first:
- Understanding the Ego
- The Ego and it forms
- The Surrender +The Power of Choice Get present – forgive + release
- The Rewards
This is a discussion worth having.
Understanding the Ego
Eckhart Tolle opened my mind and heart forever with the book A New Earth. Tolle was the first person to introduce me to the human ego and the role it plays in our subconscious mind- ultimately limiting our entire life’s experiences with its limited perception. A New Earth solidified my quest to be absolutely present in what I do. Allow my actions to be guided and empowered by awareness, rather than controlled by the egoic mind. My life has been a non-stop cycle of awakenings since the moment I opened my eyes to the existence of the human ego.
What is the ego?
Your ego is the image you have of yourself that gives you a sense of identity. That identity is derived from the story you choose tell yourself, and the world. Your ego dictates that you’ve decided to accept as truth about yourself. Vanity and pride are what most of us tend to think of when we think of ego, but ego is much more than an over-inflated sense of self. It can also turn up in feelings of inferiority or self-hatred. This ego is like a protective shell works like armor to cut you off from other people and the outside world. The ego loves to create a barrier: Here’s me and there’s the rest of the people. This sense of separation is an intrinsic part of the ego.
Be advised: The ego is also self-serving and self-centered; it can wreak havoc on your head, heart and life. The ego is hasty and always looking for instant gratification, with little to no regard for the impact. The ego is not in alignment with your intentions or your long-term goals. People who do not acknowledge the ego lose time and focus. People who are mindful create time & sharpen their focus.
You must be present + awake + aware.
The Ego and it forms
The ego is multifaceted and shows up in your mind and life in many ways. Here are 4 prominent features of the human ego to be aware of:
- Your ego has a voice that loves to chatter.
- Your ego has a splintered personality.
- Your ego dangerously impulsive – seeks stimulation.
- Your ego determines your mojo – attract + flow
#1 The Voice of the Ego
The voice you hear playing in your head is that of your ego and its dialogue of limited, self-centered opinions of the world. Sometimes the voice is a whisper, sometimes it’s a scream. Without love and attention, the voice of the ego is the prominent voice that we hear. A constant inner dialog of negative chatter, comparing ‘how it should be’, with very little consideration of others. Monitor your thoughts closely and beware of 4 common, yet lies that heard in the chatter of the ego. Your ego sees everything in terms of “I, me, my”
- Complaining – The ego loves to strengthen itself by complaining. The ego lives in a perpetual state of dissatisfaction, never content and satisfied.
- Victimization – The ego loves to make you feel like a victim of circumstance at all times. The ego loves to make you feel unloved + unsupported.
- Judgement – Stand guard against snap-judgement, it is an instant energy killer. That constant dialogue of snap- judgement robs you of the entire experience. The ego declares it already know what the person/experience has to offer. In reality, nothing could be further from the truth. Be a student in every moment, it has so much to offer.
- Comparison – The most famous lie that the ego tells is that you are not enough just as you are. The ego drives on thoughts of comparison to others that rob you of your individuality and authentic self-confidence. The ego will never stand quietly in the present, moment and give thanks for all that you are and the blessings you have received. No. The ego will take every chance to remind you that you need to do more, have more and be more in order to deserve happiness. Nothing could be further from the truth. Happiness is your birthright. Its available right now, in the present moment. When you buy into any of the ego-traps mentioned above, what you feel is the emotional response to the voice, not the actual situation at hand. You are reacting to the voice of the ego.
Recognize the need to pause.
You must be present + awake + aware.
#2 The Personality of the Ego
Much like the inauthentic voice, the ego also comes with an equally distracting personality. Welcome to the crux of nearly all bad decisions, the home of distraction, and ground zero for guilt and shame the splintered personality. The splintered personality is the pivotal point of failure for most people. They fall victim to the whimsical nature of their personality because they are not yet present enough to detect the ego and its impulsive urges.
In the book ‘The Seat of Your Soul,’ author Gary Zukav changed my behavior forever with the concept of the splintered personality. Zukav explains that the ego, disguised as your personality, runs rampant in your life inflicting pain through its self-serving impulsivity. When you are present, and have conditioned yourself to act mindfully, you can better recognize your impulsive urges and use your decompression tools to navigate through it.
If you are not conscious of the impulsive needs of the ego, you will have the experience of wanting to have your life unfold in a particular way but find yourself making decisions that do not support that goal.
Condition your mind to recognize impulsive tendencies when they occur, as they are dangerously tempting to the splintered personality. When you are feeling distracted and your ego wants to be satisfied, you are subject to impulsive decision making.
These impulsive tenancies manifest in a few very typical ways. Most of them seem harmless until you shine some loving accountability on them. People tend to gravitate toward three areas for instant gratification; food, alcohol, and shopping.
Be mindful of invitations which seem harmless, but take your focus off your goals and off your Master Schedule.
- Be aware of social invitations that are not in your Master Plan
- Last minute phone calls and invites are fun but distracting!
- Practice using your voice to confidently say ‘no thank you.’
- Be aware of impulses to eat or drink outside of your Master Plan The easiest trick ever to fill a void-food and drink.
Lack of healthy outlets and stimulation leads to indulgent consumption.
Be aware of impulses to shop
Mindless spending is the bi-product of an un-soothed personality. Lack of healthy outlets and stimulation leads to wasteful spending.
While you may not consider your actions reckless at the moment, when you string a series of impulsive decisions together, you will often find your current actions are totally out of line with your intentions.
Consider this: every impulsive decision costs you valuable time, money, and energy. The three things most people are running short on. Ask yourself-is this what I really want? Both the question and answer are simple; it’s the ability to recognize the need for the question that will be the game changer.
Understanding the Ego & Stimulation
Reduce Impulsive Behavior
Stress and emotional stimulus also affect our ability to stay focused and consistently moving forward. Depending on the conditions of your current lifestyle, you can be under or over-stimulated for a number of different reasons.
The ego recognizes your current state of emotion and promptly goes to work fortifying whatever your dominant thoughts are. The ego works in extremes, there is no neutral line. Depending on your level of awareness, you may stay there for an indeterminate amount of time.
You must embrace staying in tune with your stress and emotional stimulus levels. Create balance like a bad ass by ask yourself these questions frequently:
- Have circumstances and events caused you to become over-stimulated, over-committed, and stressed out? Feeling depleted from over doing it
- Have you pulled away for some reason and feel isolated, under-stimulated, and unmotivated? Have you disconnected with healthy habits like movement, healthy food or social interaction?
Your goal is to be energized and moving forward, but this will be impossible to achieve if you are either over or under-stimulated. Keep an eye out for both!
In most cases people find themselves over-booked and over-stimulated moving entirely too fast. Existing at an over-stimulated pace is a choice that has huge consequences. I know, those are tough words, we do what our life demands of us, but continuing at an over-stimulated rate is the direct route to stress, weight gain, poor health and complete burn out. Being over-stimulated, over-committed, and over-extended can be used as a badge of honor or a popularity tool. Let me tell you, running yourself down isn’t cool and we have the tools to help you.
It’s interesting to note that we can be over-stimulated for happy reasons as well as not-so-happy reasons, but both leave us equally unfocused.
Over-stimulated = Stress
Stress = lack of sleep + cortisol + poor food choices = weight gain
Stress = lack of sleep + cortisol + poor food choices = loss of energy
This discussion takes real honesty. Being under-stimulated is a brutal reality of being human. Why do I say brutal? Because being under-stimulated has as equally disastrous consequences on our mind and body as being over-stimulated, yet very few people want to discuss the realities of finding yourself stuck, uninspired, or dare I say depressed. Feeling stuck sucks. Its lonely, confusing and can happen the best of us at any time. Nobody is above being stuck.
Why? Because the number one falling off track to the point of stuck is CHANGE. Change is the common variable in every instance. Human beings don’t do well with change, it shocks us, it scares us, add emotional or financial elements to it and it cripples us. Throw the ego in the mix and its anybody’s guess how low we are capable of going. I know, I speak from experience.
Be honest with yourself, now and in the future under-stimulation can sneak up on all of us. Do you need to get yourself back in the game? Do you desire new energy, new friendships, or a new sense of connectedness in your life? If so, as you evaluate your weekly schedule, look for new social opportunities to say YES to. The Master Schedule is your tool for managing over or under-stimulation in a very empowering way.
Under-stimulated = Lethargy
Lethargy = too much sleep + lack of movement + poor food choices = weight gain
Lethargy = feeling disconnected + uninspired + unmotivated = loss of energy
The Surrender +The Power of Choice
Knowing what you know about the human condition and its built in boobie-traps designed to derail you, its time to Surrender your ego and step into your flow.
Let’s move past the ego and step into the area of least resistance; the present moment.
There comes a point when we get tired of feeling tired-when we are willing to do what it takes to truly be happy and ultimately successful. There comes a point when we have to throw our hands up and completely surrender. We have to agree to accept love, support and guidance from outside sources that are bigger than ourselves. There comes a point when we just have to
agree to get out of our own way. We have to learn to trust, have faith, believe in abundance and stop the fear cycle of the ego. The surrender line is truly the most liberating time in a human’s life.
The act of surrender is a radical game changer and offers a complete paradigm shift, we no longer force life we embrace it. We no longer fear life, we embrace it. And we no longer fuck with it, we just let it flow.
The power of choice
There is an easier way to live. It does not involve your ego. It’s stressful to be thin-skinned and ego driven. Being overly sensitive and easily offended will put a strain on your life. When you can discern the difference between your ego’s voice and the reality of the situation, you will start to recognize the power the present moment, everything changes. You will begin to see choice in every moment. The ego is in direct opposition to harmony, there is always a choice between the two.
Your challenge is to become more aware of your ego when it rises. Powerfully move from victim to hero in an instant. Navigating new territory effectively means taking personal ownership of emotions, as well as not making excuses for your shortcomings. The more we deny our weaknesses the stronger they appear and the more energy they require to overcome; it’s a vicious cycle.
The most typical oversight people make is not taking ownership of their current emotional capacity to reach their goals. Behind every goal must lay the ability to behave successfully, without getting derailed by your emotions. Denying your flaws is the ultimate self-sabotage; it will only limit necessary growth and development along the way. When you deny your weaknesses, you lose the ability to convert them into strengths by extracting valuable insight.
Choose to write your own story by conditioning your mind and taking ownership of your mental energy. Learn to dance with your ego and soothe it into silence. Fighting with your ego just makes it stronger.
Check your story – forgive + release
The road to the present moment.
The ego has a malicious way of convincing you to take ownership of past events. Whether it was poor decision making, an unfortunate event you experienced, or being mistreated by another person, as humans we tend carry these events with us and integrate them into the story of who we are – your makeup as a person. As time goes on, It is not uncommon to feel like you are carrying the weight of the world, or that you are buried under a lifetime of negative experiences. The ego exhausts our minds, and sometimes cripples our forward motion by hanging on to things that no longer serve us. Until now.
Gratitude, the polar opposite of the ego, offers you the opportunity to think of things a bit differently, as a matter of time and space. Those events are simply a moment in time, not ‘your story’. Those events are in the past, the moment is gone. It is only your ego which allows the pain to still exist. The ego makes the mistake of attaching those events to you. Nothing could be further from the truth.
In order to move forward efficiently in life, we must agree to set down any burdens or baggage that we carry from our past. If you dwell on negative thoughts about the past, it’s likely that these thoughts will block any positive emotions and forward thinking from coming to you.
We have a much greater power over these burdens than you ever imagined possible I have developed a four point forgive and release process to help you identify the issues that are holding you back and let them go forever so that you can begin to live completely in the present moment.
Begin to see yourself in the present moment, 100% free.
The Rewards |Three for Three
You will be rewarded for your introspective work recognizing the voice, the personality and the needs of the ego. In the same space where the negative energy used to exist, you will develop three authentic characteristics to help you navigate your life:
These characteristics are the strengths of the human spirit and are ten times more powerful than the human ego. However, they must be earned by releasing the ego and replacing it with positive thoughts.
You will adopt the ability to give thanks for everything. Let gratitude and respect for your life, drive your heart, mind, and decision making. The gratitude you extend will be recognized and returned to you tenfold. You will be presented with situations, people, and experiences with matching high-energy to guide you.
You will embrace the notion that there is more than enough time, love, money, support, and energy for everyone including you. There are no limits to your potential. Nothing will hold you back from acquiring exactly what you desire when you see that there is more than enough just waiting for you.
Authentic self-confidence is the most beautiful and empowering gift. There is no short cut to self-confidence. The only way to authentic self-confidence is an honest walk through the ego and out the other side. You have to learn to love your whole self in order to step into your whole power.
POWER CHAT | Observe
Listen carefully no matter how uncomfortable they may be. Become aware of what kind of thoughts you habitually think, especially negative thoughts: irritation, anger, impatience, and perhaps even some sadness.
Do you notice a tendency to find fault with people and situations, or to just complain in general? Do not judge yourself for having these thoughts. Simply acknowledge their existence. Embrace that there is work to be done. Always.
Listen to what your ego is telling you about your place in this world. The ego strives to keep you small and separate, feeling alone or threatened in any way possible. It is your duty to re-condition your mind to focus on your strengths, your abilities, and the authentic gifts and talents you were born with.
When people truly embrace higher-energy, it draws more attention to the poison of their ego. The quest for clearer thinking and higher-energy shift, and you start to attract more good feelings. This in turn, moves you further from your ego. Win back mental space and precious minutes so the wonder and excitement of your life can fill the spaces your ego used to claim.
You must be equipped with the heart and mind of a champion, and have an arsenal of tools at your disposal. For the energy you bring will determine the energy you attract. A high level of personal accountability is required. The results you are looking for require consistent, uninterrupted, action on your behalf. You have to walk the walk. From the moment you open your eyes until the moment you go to sleep, you are in the driver’s seat; for the rest of your life.
Gratitude cannot exist in the presence of the ego, so it makes sense that we have to clear a pathway to fully embrace the topic of gratitude.